my man left me home alone for the weekend. i'm actually 100% fine with it. for reals this time. it's just Mem*phis so it's not that bad. i'm almost over the separation anxiety. besides, some me-time is LOOOOONG overdue. i don't like it but a little time away from each other always does us good.

since he left, i've pretty much just lounged around, did some shopping, and hung out with my faggoty ass faggot friends. they do my hair for free, appreciate old school whitney and pat benatar, and i can drink without worrying about someone slipping shit in my drink. did i mention i get my hair trimmed and straightened for free? sheeeeeiiiiiitttttt nigga. i'm all over that.

then


wait for it...

...

...

...


we watched gay porn.

oh.

my.

fucking.

GAWD.

have you seen gay porn? do you know what those little fuckers do to each other? oh my gawd. just, oh my gawd. it was traumatizing but i couldn't stop watching. everytime someone's ass got penetrated, i threw my hands up, clenched my ass cheeks and screamed. i seriously hurt for them. killed my little buzz i had going too. that's what i get for being so damn *curious*. i don't know how people do it. i just don't. two out of the three times i've tried it, i cried. it ain't natural. and the only reason i didn't cry that one time was cause i was too drunk to notice. the morning after wasn't too pleasant though.

i wonder if they have fecal incontinence. i know when i explained it [fecal incontinence] to J, any thoughts of any "backdoor exploration" he had left vanished completely.

i miss him. it's getting late and i don't have him here to feel on my booty or say "just lift your leg a little" so he can get some while i'm trying to go to sleep. and that stupid dog is getting on my damn nerves with all that damn whimpering. i miss him more than you. stupid bitch. she needs to run away or somethin.

i think i'm gonna cry.

Labels: my love, so random, this is who i am

--i refused to spellcheck @ 10:42 PM | |