i'm tired.
it's like no amount of sleep is ever sufficient enough for me.
i wanna not spend so much time having sex but i can't.
for one, it's too damn good.
secondly, J says he could deal with once a day, but that's a goddamn lie.
all i have to do is touch him and he's ready to bone.

*

i think the reason i can't seem to shake this cold is because of the cort shots.
my immune system is fucking shot but at least i'm not in excruciating pain.
at least right now.
my doctor told me i'd be paralyzed before i'm 25 if i don't get it *fixed*.
whatthefuckever.

*

J's drunk.
he's pretty annoying when he's drunk.
like, right now he's outside singing yelling "ball of confusion".
too bad he doesn't know any of the words.
it probably would be really mean to lock him out.
but highly entertaining.
when he yells my name, it's like that scene in "a streetcar named desire" after stanley and stella fight, and stanley's outside yelling "STELLLLAAAAAA!"
except J's silly ass yells "MIMIIIIIIII"

when i lock him out, he'll start banging on the door, yelling my name.
LET ME IN!
MIMIIIIIIIIII!!
after about a minute of that he'll just press his body against the door, and with his face smushed up against the glass, "baby, baby, baaaaaaaabe. please let me in. you know i luh you."

*

i'm making a conscious effort to gain a little weight.
i'm starting to miss my semi-curvaceousness.
that's probably not a word, but who cares.
i'm really confused by J not saying anything about my current weight.
like, when i'm going thru a binge/purge cycle, he'll sit me down and talk to me about it, and when i've gained weight he'll say he likes it, but he's never said anything about my weight when i've been thinner than normal/usual.

*

my sister and nephew are coming up to visit me in a couple of weeks.
i'm so excited.
i haven't seen that whore and my little fat-fat in forever.
we were never really that close [even though she's only 2 years older than me] when we were growing up, but when she got knocked up we sorta kinda made up for lost time.
i loved rubbing her buddha belly whenever i was home visiting.
i think i just like her cause she's given me a nephew to spoil.
now, she's the one i always call when i wanna talk about getting married and having kids at a young age.
i still hate her husband though.

*

lady readers, have any of you tried john frieda's frizz-ease shampoo/conditioner?
i've been using the serum for a long time but i'm not sure if i'm ready to ditch my garnier sleek and shine yet.
but i am open to suggestions for any good shampoos/conditioners for the frizziness.
thanks in advance lovers.

*

i haven't read any blogs on a regular basis in a really long time.
i'm sorry, y'all.
i'm gonna try to get back into the groove though.
when summer's over.

*

summer.
bleh.
so overrated but i miss not actually having one.
no sleeping in.
no staying out all night every night.
no real vacation.
this growing up thing is not allit's cracked up to be.

*

i'm gonna try to have a hump day sex question up tomorrow but no promises.
days can be so hectic so i don't get a chance to post until late night.
i prefer having them up early in the day so my 9-to-5'ers have a chance to answer.
i don't know.
whatever.

*

i think that's it.
i'm sleepy.

Labels: this is who i am

--i refused to spellcheck @ 11:25 PM | |