i know i have a very strong personality. i've been through too much shit in my short, though seemingly long, life. anything less than strong would be inappropriate.

i'm opinionated and i'm not afraid to speak my mind. if someone's feelings gets hurt in the process, boofuckinghoo.
kleenexes are on aisle 5.
grab a box.

however, i feel like people misconstrue my forwardness and bluntness as me being a bitch.
the way i see it, i'm only a bitch when necessary.

if i've intentionally set out to hurt someone's feelings and make them cry like the little pussy s/he is, then yeah, i'm a bitch. but only in that particular situation.
shit like that doesn't happen that often anymore, though.
and i've never been a bitch to anyone without provocation.
i generally don't like people when i first meet them, but i'm not rude or mean unless you give me a reason to be.

that's why i've come to the conclusion it's not me.
it's them.
it's all of them.
85% women.
11.75% men
3.25% children.

i just know the first charge i catch is gonna be because some 12 year old fucked with me on the wrong goddamn day causing me to snap, ultimately leading up to me body-slamming that little fucker in the produce section of kroger, snapping his/her spine in 3 places. not that i've contemplated it or anything. i'm just sayin.

today's adventures are a perfect example of me being provoked causing SuperBitch to show her pretty and newly tanned face:

today, J and i went to panera for lunch. we sat outside since the temp hadn't reached 'satan's anus' yet. we're still enjoying each other's presence after having spent 3 whole days apart so we were engaging in some slightly inappropriate PDA. i had nothing to do with that boner. i just kept it alive and well. TEAM FORNICATION!

anyhoos, while we were being the annoying couple we are, some girl i do not know, or even care to know for that matter, comes over and says hey to J and pulls a chair over to our table. the whore sat her bulky ass down beside J and started talking to him like i wasn't even there. i'm thinking 'the fuck? i know this bitch sees me cause i'm sitting right here leaning on this man's shoulder with my arms wrapped around his, but she did not even acknowledge me. is she testing my gangsta?'

as J was about to speak, presumably to introduce me and let that bitch know how fucking rude she was, i put my hand up and was like "uh uh. let's rewind this shit and try it again."

that bitch looked and scoffed at me like i was a crackhead begging for change. so i grabbed my bag and took my knife and mace out and sat it on the table.

"mmkay, this is gonna happen one of two ways, either you get your ass up from this table, walk away, and come back and say 'hello' to the both of us, or i spray you with this mace and stab your ass a few times with this pretty little knife. i'd go with the former but it is your choice. i suggest you choose wisely."

apparently, she's smarter than she acts cause she chose to get her ass up but it didn't matter anymore cause i'd decided it was time for me and J to leave.

the point is, that entire situation could've been avoided had she not been a rude tramp. i am not casper the friendly ghost. i will hurt you.

i keeps it real.

Labels: this is who i am

--i refused to spellcheck @ 6:57 PM | |