J and i went to see "the texas chainsaw massacre: the beginning" last night. now, correct me if i'm wrong, but weren't they pushing that movie as a prequel? you know, it was supposed to be about shit that happened with that fucked up ass family before the murders.
well that's what i went into themovie theater thinking. and sure enough, that's how it started. i'd say a good 15 minutes worth of little leatherface [and the fam] before he became a psychopathic chainsaw-slinging cannibal. but then, it went to the shit that we already knew was gonna happen because of the original and the remake of TCM.
so, we're sitting there and they show the 4 kids in the jeep/van thingy. and me being the loudmouth bitch i am, i go "uh uh, hell no. they just fastforwarded the movie! i don't wanna see this shit! i know what's gonna happen. these dumb motherfuckers are gonna get chased around and chopped up. and leatherface is gonna be all on the dirt road dancing with the chainsaw at the end."
and J's punk ass and some other people shushed me. oh no. i'm a grown ass woman. you do not shush me.
after yelling at J and half of the theater, i was not-so-politely asked to leave. i didn't really care though, cause for one, i didn't pay. secondly, i had to pee and i refuse to go near a public toilet. and most importantly, there was a lovely pint of ben and jerry's half baked ice cream [vanilla and chocolate ice cream with brownies and chocolate chip cookie dough. SOOO fucking good.] and a new can of whipped cream at home waiting for me and my baby to dig into. it was grrrrreat.
and i got some dick again too. be jealous.
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my nips haven't leaked today. yay--*happy clap*. it's not really a massive amount when there is leakage, just a few drops, but i'm a little melodramatic so, for me, it's like an entire gallon of milk spewing outta each nipple. and i don't like it.
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is it just me or are there entirely too many baby toys commercials on tv? fisher price needs to go suck a fat one. whenever i see one their commercials, i start foaming at the mouth- my baby's is getting all of that shit. oh, and is that commercial with spiderman singing the itsy bitsy spider not the gayest thing ever? yeah, my kid's not getting that shit. cause it ain't fisher price. and it's GAY. GAAAAAAAAYYYYY!!! i love the fags, but there's some shit i cannot and will not tolerate. spiderman rocking out to the itsy spider is one of them.
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hmmmmm...... am i really gonna get hemorrhoids? i mean, if i start eating raisin bran and taking fiber pills everyday from now until the baby's here, will that prevent it? i can't have a nasty-looking asshole and do it doggy style. baby jesus and J and i will weep for days.
i'm too fucking superficial for pregnancy. i don't wanna gain over 30 pounds; i can't have stretchmarks; i don't want a loose giney; i'm going on a killing spree if i get hemorrhoids. if you know i have hemorrhoids, you must die. that includes people reading this shit everyday. i know who you are. and i'll find out where you live. i have connections.
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i'm getting a headache just thinking about the possibility of me actually having hemorrhoids. i need some food and another nap.
