i can't sleep.
i've been staying at my friend amy's.
she's been my shoulder to cry on the past few days.
so, at least i can say i have one good friend to count on.
i think she's letting me stay because i've been cleaning ever since i got here and i cook for her.
i'm probably gonna go look for a new place on monday and get my stuff out of the house some time during the week when i know he won't be there.
i don't think he misses me.
he hasn't called.
not even once since i left.
i thought for sure he would call yesterday [saturday] or i'd see him at the mausoleum and we'd talk and makeup.
nothing.
he probably didn't even remember.
and you know i would take him in a heartbeat if he asked, but i don't think he cares anymore.
that makes this allthemore painful.
we've known each other since we were kids and spent the past 4 years together.
how can he just let it all go like that?
was i really that hard to be with?
all i know is that my heart can't possibly take another loss like this.

Labels: my love, this is who i am

--i refused to spellcheck @ 2:00 AM | |