1. today's Jay's birfday. we're not doing anything fancy, but we invited some friends along for some laser tag. i bought him an ice cream cake and that selfish bastard got high and ate half of it before i got a piece. i'm not mad though. he did some nice things with his tongue to make up for it. we're gonna stay home and put some burgers on the grill and get drunk and do the nasty. i bought lots of new sexy lingerie from victoria's secret yesterday. i might let him stick it in my butt. that's a lie. some things just aren't meant to be; letting that boy put his dick in my butthole is one of them. i can't do it. i won't do it. it's not natural. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BABY!!! ^_^

2. i'm gonna wait to take the GRE. i think it'd be better to see where Jay is gonna go for his MBA [he's taking the GMAT in 2 weeks] and how the new baby business will unfold before i start getting caught up in all of that. he's obviously gonna apply to v@ndy, but there's no guarantee he'll get in and if we have to move somewhere, i don't want to have to worry about withdrawing and transfer credits and all that shit. and the more i think about it, i'd be a lot more happy and satisfied being a stay-at-home mom for a while than going back to school.

3. we may be doing lollapalooza. it depends on how many people can go. a lot of the bands that played bonnaroo will be there so we wouldn't be missing THAT much, but i kinda wanna go to as many shows as possible before the year's over.

4. i never thought i'd say this, but i'll be glad when i start my period so i can go on the pill again. even though we decided on late fall/early winter to start TTC, we're not being very careful. condoms suck ass. they ruin the moment.

5. i really need to start hitting the gym again. i should buy one of those stripper poles and start doing that cardio striptease workout at home. i'm limber. i could do that shit. i might bust my ass a few times, but i'm a quick learner.

6. why are my tits smaller now?

7. the other night i dreamt of dancing pancakes, waffles, and crepes. they wouldn't let me eat the waffles though. i was pissed. i love waffles.

8. 3am fingerbangs still rock my socks. wait, i don't wear socks. 3am fingerbangs rock.

9. is it wrong to have sex dreams about your celebrity crush? i am well aware that i will never get within two feet of david beckham, but i have a lot of dirty dreams about him and i always feel bad about it. maybe i'm crazy or maybe Jay's got an extreme amount of pussy control, but to me lusting after another man is just as bad as actually cheating. [insert sigh here]

10. i'm kinda horny now.

Labels: my love, so random, this is who i am

--i refused to spellcheck @ 7:19 PM | |