little muffin,

you turned 2 months old this past saturday and today was your well-baby checkup. it did not go very well. not at all. i don't think you like your pediatrician. and, to be honest, i don't really like her either. she probably thinks i'm a big, fat liar because the description i give of you and your temperament is the total opposite of the way you behaved. you cried for nearly 2 hours, like you were being tortured and i don't know why. it's one thing when you cry because you're hungry, sleepy, or you have a wet diaper; that's easy to fix. it's a whole other bunch of bananas when you're crying inconsolably and i don't know why or how to fix it. and this is BEFORE a needle ever came in contact with your fat thigh.

here's my heart.
here's a hammer.
bang bang bang.
squish squish squish.

you are such a chunky baby. you're up to 12.5 pounds and almost 24 inches long. almost double your birth weight and nearly triple your birth length. i know it's selfish, but i'd really like for you to stop growing and stay my littleface forever. you're hitting all these milestones at once and there's no tivo for baby milestones. you smile all the time which just makes my heart melt. you definitely know mommy and daddy's voices and faces now. in fact, you're becoming very fickle with whom you spend your cuddle time with. today is a daddy day. the only reason i'm not totally offended is because i'm exhausted and daddy took the day off from work to be with you while i catch up on some sleep. right now, you two are in bed beside me. you're laying on your daddy's chest, staring into his eyes, holding his nose, and making your sweet baby sounds while he rubs your little head and sore leg and tell you how precious you are. i'm not crying; i have something in my eyes.

a couple of weeks ago, you started holding your head up, and now you're trying to push up when you're on your tummy. seriously, ava-marie taylor, mommy really needs you to stop growing so damn fast! you love music very, very much. you get very squirmy and smiley whenever there's music on and i think it's one of too many cute things about you. i didn't think it was possible, but i found something very uncute about you: you like to stink. you NEVER cry when you have a poopy diaper. there are some nights when i'm too tired to function and because you sleep so well, i forget to wake up to check on you. when i do, you're soaking wet and you have pooped several times in your diaper. and those diapers? leak protection my ass. you don't know how many times we've moved your big crib into our bedroom because you've gotten poo all over the bassinet. everywhere, ava. everywhere.

you've gotten so much better with bathtime. your first baths were hellacious. i'm sure you'll see the tapes when you're older. now, you hardly cry at all. you still get water all over the place, but you're not fussy. i'll take messy over fussy any day. you're also sleeping a lot longer through the night. that can be a really good thing, but most of the time it's not. you see, you're a breastfed baby. momma can only go so long without nursing you. it hurts like hell when i don't feed your a certain amount of time. and this is actually me not being selfish, i literally hurt from my boobs being so engorged. 4 hours is pushing it. anything past that and i'm waking your little ass up for some relief.

we are fast approaching your very first holidays. thanksgiving is this week so we have a lot of family coming to visit. you get to see your aunt Jess almost every day so she won't be much of a surprise. grandma V will be coming tomorrow and staying a whole week. she's that lady that always smells like vanilla and kept trying to steal you away from me the last time she was here. she's doing all the cooking, so you don't have to worry about getting swooped away. but do you think you can get her mac n cheese recipe for mommy? you won't get to experience it just yet, but she makes the best german chocolate cake EVER. grandpa J and grandma M and the rest of your aunts, uncles, and 2 very mischievous cousins will be coming the night before and the day of turkey day.

you have recently discovered you ears. when i first noticed you sticking your thumbs in your ears, i was so scared you had an ear infection and i watched you like a hawk stalking its prey for 2 days straight. but you never got a fever and you didn't fuss any more than usual; you just like sticking your wet thumb in your ear. which reminds me, i would really like for you to stop sucking your thumb. i know this is something you did while you were still in mommy's belly and i thought it was the cutest thing, but it kinda bothers me that you self-soothe by sucking your thumb. for one, i don't want it to become a nasty little habit that i have to break later on. and two, i don't want it to interfere with nursing you. although, judging by how well you nurse and how big you are, the second reason doesn't bear much weight. just stop sucking your thumb, okay? kay.

my sweet little girl, you are truly something special. i know i tell you that every day, but it's true! words cannot express how much i love you. waking up to your angelic, smiling little face is only one of many joys you bring to my life. i know i can be a little smothering with all the hugs and kisses-- i probably gave you your first hickey-- but it's only because i love you and your cutesy fatness. you're growing so fast already! it makes me so happy and so sad all at the same time. soon, you'll be crawling and walking and causing all kinds of hell and i don't feel like i'll ever be ready for that. you'll understand exactly what i mean when you're older, a LOT older, and start having kids of your own. for now, could you just slow it a down a little? there's so much of you to enjoy and only so many hours in a day. momma needs time to marinate in all of your baby-ness.

love you always,

momma

Labels: littleface

--i refused to spellcheck @ 5:08 PM | |