well, my fat ass is exhausted. i'd planned to spend the morning waiting impatiently by the phone to get the inspection results of our prospective home, eating, and then napping the rest of the day. instead, i was forced to do stuff because my husband is a douchenozzle.

time: this morning
place: the kitchen
what: typical conversation between me and my husband

Me: I found another stray hair. this time? it was on my tummy. right below my belly button.
Jay: Yeah, I thought I saw that last night.
M: And you didn't think that was something I needed to know?
J: Nope. Cause you get those tweezers and start poking and tweezing around for hours. And then you start tweezing my eyebrows. I don't like that.
M: I'm just makin' sure you stay pretty.
J: It's gay, Mimi. GAAAAYYYYY.
M: Yeah, and you spending an hour looking at yourself in the mirror isn't.....
J: You gotta respect the sexy, dollface. Respect the sexy. By the way, I need you to take the truck in for service at 9 o'clock.
M: This morning? For what?
J: It's due for an oil change and all that maintenance stuff.
M: Why are you always waiting 'til the last minute to tell me stuff like that? You know that's gonna take forever. Why can't you do it?
J: I have to go to work. It's not like you're doing anything else.
M: I'M MAKING A BABY!!! YOU DON'T DO SHIT!!!
J: Excuse me, use your inside voice. And I need you to go get food and drinks and stuff for the cookout.
M: *gasp* I WANT A DIVORCE!
J: YOU ALWAYS WANT A DIVORCE! SHUT UP!!
M: Don't yell at me.

so i had to sit at the stupid dealership for damn near 4 hours. gah, i can't remember the last time i was so annoyed and uncomfortable. i was annoyed at the fact that i had to be there to begin with. then, those cuntfaces had the tv on foxnews and after every fucking segment, this old lady would turn to ME and start giving me her loose change. if i want to hear your opinion, i'll ask for it; i'm trying to make a grocery list here. then she started asking about the baby and our plans and giving parenting advice. i really hate it when people do that.

and the chairs-- straight back with nearly no cushion. after an hour of that fuckery, i had to make one of the guys behind the desk give me his chair because i couldn't stand sitting in that bullshit. actually, sitting in shit would've been a helluva lot more comfortable. i was so glad to finally get out of that place. made me miss the young and the restless.

and then there was grocery shopping. as if gas prices going up every day weren't enough, now i gotta spend double the amount for the same quantity of food. i compared the amount i spent last month to this month's receipt and i spent almost $100 more on nearly the exact same items.

something just ain't right.
ugh.

by the time i made it home, i was ready to decapitate the next person who even blinked an eye in my direction. but then Jay called, and i always get all giggly when it's him no matter how pissed off i am, to tell me about the inspection of the house. everything is perfect. well, almost. the current owners have to install a new cooling unit thingy, but we already knew about that. so, now all that's left is all the legal stuff. i'm not exactly sure how long that'll take but i'm pretty sure July will be the month Jay and i are officially homeowners. i'm so excited i could piss my pants. *happy dance*

in case you didn't catch the name in the comments section of the previous post, we decided to name our little mama, Ava-Marie Taylor. i finally got Jay's seal of approval saturday night; although, i think alcohol and my really really good sex did the trick. i really liked the names Ava & Taylor but they didn't really mesh well. so, i was gonna go with Ava Marie [Marie in honor of my maternal grandmother, Maria] but i didn't feel like it had enough pizzazz. then Ava-Marie Taylor popped in my head and that was it. my little diva has her name now. my favoritest gayboy says it sounds like a drag queen's name, but all the queens i know are full of divalicious fierceness, so it's PERFECT!

now, we've just gotta get moved in our new house and get it ready for our little squishy's arrival.

Labels: my love, new baby business, so random

--i refused to spellcheck @ 5:12 PM | |